Is the Dalai Lama a Peeping Tom?

A woman in Calico Rock, Arkansas claims she caught the Dalai Lama peering into her window on Wednesday evening as she changed into her nightgown.

“He just stared at me through them creepy aviator glasses,” a visibly distraught Sally Brainard told police. “I think he might’ve been touching himself under that red robe.”

The 76-year old spiritual leader, who admitted to Piers Morgan this week that he’s often tempted by women, says it’s a case of mistaken identity.

“His Holiness claims he was in Chicago at the World Summit of Nobel Peace Laureates,” said Joseph Reitman, the police detective investigating the incident. “I’d be a rich man if I had a nickel for every time some pervert gave that alibi.”