sex

Pat Sajak admitted recently that he used to host Wheel of Fortune drunk.

“There was a bar in my dressing room,” recalls the 65-year old. “I’d do Jager Bombs with the interns before the show, and once sucked down a fifth of whisky during a commercial break.”

Producers eventually had to step in after Sajak propositioned sidekick Vanna White by asking her to “spin the wheel in (his) pants.”

“That was a dark period of my life,” Sajak told OMGG.com. “I knew I had to stop drinking when a guy asked to buy a vowel and I told him to go f#ck himself.”

When it comes to picking a candidate to square off against Barack Obama in this year’s presidential election, Republicans have a tough decision to make.

Rich Mormon or fat philanderer?

Last week, Marianne Gingrich revealed that she, too, was forced to make a tough choice back in 1999. Get divorced, or allow her husband to continue to make love to his much-younger mistress.

The leading GOP candidate’s ex-wife told The Washington Post that ten years later, she regrets the decision she made that day.

“It’s like Newt used to say, family values are only for poor people and gays,” she told OMGG.com. “How could I realistically expect someone that beautiful to be monogamous?”

Is Kardashian matriarch Kris a bigger tart than her tawdry trio of temptresses?

Star magazine is reporting that Khloe doesn’t have the same father as sisters Kim and Kourtney, and thus isn’t a true Kardashian.

“Khloe’s real dad could be any man who visited the Los Angeles area in the late-70s,” admitted Bruce Jenner. “Kris has had more men inside her than the average gay bar.”

Khloe, whose looks indicate she’s likely the spawn of Andre the Giant, is said to be taking the news in stride.

“She’s fine, but I feel duped. I was under the impression I married a Kardashian,” a disappointed Lamar Odom told OMGG.com. “This won’t in any way affect my celebrity status, will it?”

(THE FOLLOWING IS A CELEBRITY-WRITTEN NOTE CONFISCATED BY A MAILMAN ON THE OMGG.COM PAYROLL.  THE RESPONSE LETTER CAN BE FOUND BELOW THE ONE WRITTEN BY SPENCER):

Dear Match.com,

I’ve been trying to meet someone new since Heidi is refusing to go on Relationship Rehab with me to work out our problems. I’ve tried all the conventional dating methods — chat rooms, bars, escort services, underground orgies, etc, but nothing has worked.

A friend recently convinced me to give online courtship a try, claiming he met tons of easy chicks that were looking to party.  I signed up for Lavalife because I saw their ad featuring a beauty in a bikini, and thought to myself, “that’s someone I’d totally bang.”  Unfortunately, the only girls who replied to my ad were either too old, or refused to email a photo (probably fatties).

I’m thinking of giving Match.com a whirl, but wanted to know if there is any sort of “money-back guarantee” if I don’t get laid.  I listed a free profile a while back and got a few winks, but that was probably just because I’m good-looking.

Let me know,

Spencer Pratt

Former American Idol finalist Adam Lambert and his reality star boyfriend, Sauli Koskinen, were incarcerated last night after an alleged barroom brawl. But the couple insists it was all just a ploy to get a free vacation.

“We’d talked about going on a romantic cruise, but neither of us could afford it,” explained Lambert. “So we opted for a night in a Finnish prison…and it was everything we’d dreamed it’d be.”

Koskinen, a contestant on Finland’s Big Brother, said he’ll never forget the time he and Adam shared in the communal showers. In fact, he said there were only two things he didn’t like about jail — the food, and witnessing a guard get stabbed to death with a toothbrush.

“It was just the spark their relationship needed,” Helsinki Central Prison inmate Janne Braaten told OMGG.com. “As visitors to this fine establishment, they were able to experience what we call the three Rs — rest, relaxation and rape.”

After his team suffered a 41-23 loss to the New England Patriots yesterday, quarterback Tim Tebow allegedly lost his faith in God.

“Minutes after the game ended, Tim stormed out of the locker room calling Tom Brady ‘the devil’,” said teammate Willis McGahee. “I started to pray, hoping he wouldn’t do something stupid.”

Sadly, the formerly pious Broncos star was arrested at 3am this morning in downtown Denver for public intoxication and soliciting a prostitute.

“He pulled up alongside me, drunk on Sacramental wine,” hooker Delilah Jones told OMGG.com in an exclusive interview. “He said his lord and savior had let him down, then offered me $40 to ‘satisfy his Tebowner’.”

Looks like Zac Efron has gone cougar hunting.

The 24-year old actor recently swapped spit with Michelle Pfeiffer, 53, in Gary Marshall’s latest ensemble flick New Year’s Eve.

The film also stars Ashton Kutcher, who said the on-screen chemistry between Efron and Pfeiffer led to an affair after shooting wrapped.

“Their relationship makes me nauseous,” Kutcher confessed to OMGG.com. “Why on earth would a young stud like Efron ever fall for an aging, former-sex symbol actress?”

Herman Cain suspended his presidential campaign over the weekend, citing the public outcry over his “cluster of loquacious hoes.”

“The dozens of women who’ve come forward with accusations of affairs are all liars. I’ve never cheated on Brenda,” said Mr. Cain, who later apologized for calling his wife Gloria by the wrong name.

At the emotional rally in Atlanta, the former Godfather’s Pizza CEO said he’s confident the GOP will thrive under the leadership of another qualified candidate.

“I’m pleased to announce that I’m officially endorsing Michele Bachmann,” revealed Cain. “Not only do I approve of her conservative ideals, she also has a stunningly great set of tits.”